


A Madman In A Box

by cordeliadelayne



Category: Doctor Who, Inception (2010)
Genre: Crossover, Flirting, Kissing, M/M, Slash, the TARDIS as matchmaker, the doctor as matchmaker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-11
Updated: 2015-08-11
Packaged: 2018-04-14 03:52:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4549251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cordeliadelayne/pseuds/cordeliadelayne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor entrusts Rory with a special mission.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Madman In A Box

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fififolle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fififolle/gifts).



> Written as a present for the lovely fififolle who gave the prompt “saving your arse.” Originally posted to Livejournal in 2012.

“So, it's bigger on the inside, then?”

“Yes.”

“Not the prettiest architecture I've ever seen.”

“I wouldn't say that too loud. She won't like it.”

“She?”

“The TARDIS.”

“Of course she's a she. Makes perfect sense.”

“It does?”

“Oh Rory, it does indeed.”

**24 Hours Earlier**

“They can do what?” Rory was asking the Doctor.

In response the Doctor threw him a silver case that he almost dropped on his foot. “Steal your secrets from your mind. Make you believe whatever they want you to. Ingenious really.” The Doctor peered at the TARDIS's console ad started pressing some buttons. Rory watched carefully but as far as he could tell the Doctor never got the same results twice, no matter what combination of keys he pressed.

“And this is on Earth?”

The Doctor absent-mindedly nodded; he'd already moved on to their next problem.

Knowing that he would get no sense out of the Doctor, and wishing that Amy and River were here instead of enjoying a weekend together on a spa planet, he opened up the case and tried to work out for himself exactly how it worked. There was something very clinical and medical about the apparatus, and it didn't take him long to realise how the sedatives and other drugs worked.

When he looked up it was to find the Doctor staring at him, something akin to pride on his face. It was gone so quickly that Rory almost believed he had imagined it.

“Come on then, we're here.”

“Where's here?” Rory asked.

“The scene of the crime.”

* * * * *

It looked like any perfectly ordinary street in any normal, modern, city on Earth. But Rory had learned long ago that appearances were very much not to be believed when you were travelling with the Doctor and he tried to keep his senses as alert as he could.

“What are we doing, again?” Rory asked, as if the Doctor had already filled him in on the plan; he hadn't, but the Doctor had a tendency to forget things like that.

“I told you, we're doing a favour for her Royal Highness the Princess Constantina of the People of Palentia.”

Rory waited, hoping that there was more.

The Doctor sighed. “Why do you never listen?” he asked.

Rory was about to snap back when the door of the building in front of them shot open and a man dressed in a suit was looking them up and down.

“Doctor?” he asked.

“You must be Eames,” the Doctor said. “This is my assistant, Rory.”

Rory tried to look as if he knew what the Doctor was talking about. Something he seemed to fail at doing on every occasion when it seemed required.

“Well, hello Rory. This is going to be even more fun than I imagined. Come in.”

Rory felt distinctively out of his depth.

“Oh, no,” the Doctor said, “I won't be joining you. Just show Rory what we agreed.”

“What? What do you mean you’re not coming?” The Doctor started moving away and Rory hurried after him, grabbing his arm and turning him around. “You haven't told me what I'm doing.”

“The Royal Princess has given her lover the Count of Montelbarno some information she shouldn't have. You're going to retrieve it from his mind before he gets to use it.”

“Isn't that a little, unethical?” Rory asked.

The Doctor shrugged, and Rory frowned. Something wasn't right but he didn't have time to question it as Eames took his hand and pulled him towards the building. He did spot the Doctor heading away from the TARDIS though, and had a moment to wonder just where he was going, before the lure of Inception called him.

* * * * *

“Beautiful, isn't it?” Eames asked after he'd explained the inner works of the PASIV device. That wasn't the word Rory would have used.

“Isn't it dangerous? For the subject and you?”

“It can be,” Eames replied. He leaned over the chair Rory was sat in and turned the page of the instruction manual Rory was examining. His breath ghosted against Rory's neck and Rory shivered. “Of course, where there's danger there's excitement, and arousal.”

Rory jumped up out of the chair. “So, the Doctor told you what he wants to happen then?”

“Let me take you on a grand tour first.”

“A tour of what?” Rory asked, looking around the deserted warehouse. Apart from the small section Eames had set up shop in, there didn’t appear to be anything that would account for much of a tour.

“A tour of my mind,” Eames replied, and gave a smile full of teeth. Rory decided he was in big trouble.  
  
* * * * * *

In fact, being inside someone else's mind wasn't as strange as it could have been. Nor was it a new experience for Rory. Not that he was going to tell Eames that. He had the distinct impression that Eames was not a man to be trusted.

Still, Rory tried his hand at creating a world and could see why it could be so addictive, there was something magical about having all that power, of twisting the world to your own ends. He imagined it was what the Doctor battled against all the time.

“Amazing, isn't it?” Eames said.

He pressed Rory up against the nearest wall and all the people – no, all the projections – turned to look at them.

“Should they be doing that?” Rory asked.

“Don't worry, everything's under control,” Eames reassured him.

Then Eames kissed him, fierce and brutal. Rory flailed for a moment before allowing himself to be kissed. It certainly wasn't an unpleasant feeling.

Eventually they broke apart and Rory realised that they were surrounded by projections.

“That isn't normal, is it?”

Eames seemed a little dazed. “Sorry, darling, what was that?” Then he too realised that they were surrounded.

“Ah, yes, perhaps time for an exit strategy...Come on.”

He grabbed Rory's hand and started to pull him through a door that just appeared in the wall next to them. It disappeared just as quickly and the projections started to shout and batter against it.

“That was, impressive,” Rory said. And he'd seen a lot of impressive things in his time.

“Hmm, yes, now...”

Eames was interrupted though by the breaking of glass. They both looked up just in time to see that projections were scaling down through the skylight, glass falling about them like leaves from a tree. Eames pushed Rory out of the way of the largest shard.

“Death by falling glass – particularly painful. I was thinking shooting you in the head might be more conducive.”

“You what?” Rory asked, jumping to his feet.

Eames pulled out a gun and Rory was about to object, loudly, when he was thrown to the floor by a projection which started to punch him. He quickly defended himself as best he could – being a Roman soldier counted for something after all – but there were too many coming straight for him and he had no idea what they wanted, other than to cause him as much damage as possible.

Then Eames was right there, punching a path straight to him and pulling him to his feet.

“What are you doing?” Rory asked.

“Saving your arse,” Eames replied. Then he pulled the trigger.

* * * * *

Rory woke up to find himself flailing and then falling onto the floor. Eames woke up much more sedately next to him.

“What the hell was that?”

“That's how you wake up,” Eames replied. He pulled Rory into a soft kiss that Rory was too stunned to do anything about. The fact that he rather liked the way Eames kept surprising him with kisses was neither here nor there.

“And you people enjoy living like this?”

“There's no better way,” Eames replied, and seemed to mean it. “Pure creation, life doesn't get more amazing than that.”

Rory picked himself up from the floor. Just when you thought you’d met every mad man the universe could throw up.

“Actually, there's something a lot more amazing than that.”

Eames looked sceptical. “Really? And you just happen to have access to it, do you?”

“As a matter of fact,” Rory replied, mind made up. “Come on, time for me to show _you_ something.”

He lead Eames out to the TARDIS. The Doctor still didn't seem to be anywhere nearby, which was certainly suspicious, but Eames had his hand on his back, which was certainly doing wonders for his ability to forget about the Doctor.

“It's a police box,” Eames pointed out.

“Not entirely,” Rory replied, and opened the door.

“So, it's bigger on the inside, then?” Eames asked, moving around the console.

“Yes.”

“Not the prettiest architecture I've ever seen.” Eames glanced up at the ceiling, wondering how far up it went.

“I wouldn't say that too loud. She won't like it.”

“She?”

“The TARDIS.”

“Of course she's a she. Makes perfect sense.” He patted the console next to him and then stroked it. Rory decided to ignore the movement.

“It does?”

“Oh Rory, it does indeed.”

Before Rory quite knew what was happening he was being pushed up against the console. “I think we have ourselves a little matchmaker,” he whispered, swooping in for a quick kiss.

“Ah, excellent, you're back!” the Doctor shouted. He was walking down the stairs and rubbing his hands together as if he had just perfectly executed one of his madcap schemes. Rory had a very bad feeling.

“So, ready for the off, then?” the Doctor asked. He moved around Rory and Eames as if it were perfectly normal for them to be plastered to each other, Rory practically sitting on the TARDIS's console.

“Off?” Rory asked.

“I do believe I'm going to be saving your arse for a few more years to come,” Eames said, eyes crinkling as he smiled. Rory's heart positively did not melt.

“Actually,” he said, pushing Eames a little away so that he could stand up straight. “I think you'll find I'll be saving your arse.”

Eames only laughed and dragged Rory back into the depths of the TARDIS. They both ignored the Doctor's pleased expression; it wouldn’t do to give him an even bigger head than he had already.


End file.
